Holidays don't mean much to me anymore they haven't for years. Most of them are just irritating because too many things are closed and it interferes with my schedule. I've received many more evp messages from Josh in my recordings. I wish I could post them here on my blog but I'm not able to. I have them kept in my Wavepad. Today finally cooled off a bit here in San Diego. It's cloudy. I've asked for a butterfly but with it being cloudy not sure if any will be around. Josh uses his energy to manipulate the butterfly. He's not the actual butterfly. I feel he visits me pretty much every night in my dreams now. He wants me to start wearing his tee shirt instead of keeping it under my pillow trying to preserve his scent in it. The scent is fading. It's almost gone and for some reason this hurts so much. I think it's because his scent on that tee shirt was his last human connection to me that ever will be. This tears my heart out and I don't know why.
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